Gottman Method

How to Make Your Partner Feel Loved: A Gottman Method Exercise for Building Fondness and Admiration

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Couple sitting together sharing written lists of things that make them feel loved as part of Gottman Method fondness and admiration exercise

Most couples know what makes them feel criticized or dismissed by their partner. You can probably rattle off a list without even thinking about it. But here’s what’s interesting: When I ask couples to tell me what their partner does that makes them feel loved, respected, or admired, they often go blank. Or they struggle. … Read more

Seven Principles vs. Sound Relationship House: Understanding Gottman’s Unified Framework

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Couple sitting together at a kitchen table reviewing materials with engaged curious expressions

If you’ve read John Gottman’s books or researched couples therapy, you’ve likely encountered both the Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work and the Sound Relationship House theory, and wondered whether they’re the same thing, different approaches, or one superseding the other. David Lechnyr, LCSW, a Certified Gottman Therapist in Oregon and Arizona, explains how these two frameworks relate to each other, which one applies to clinical practice versus self-help reading, and why understanding the distinction matters for couples doing the work.

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How CBT Enhances Gottman Method Couples Therapy

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CBT couples therapy session using Gottman Method with licensed therapist serving Oregon and Arizona virtually

Bottom Line: As one of the few Certified Gottman Therapists with Beck Institute CBT training serving Oregon and Arizona, I help couples break destructive communication cycles and rebuild connection. By combining Gottman’s research-backed methods with CBT’s practical tools, couples create lasting change in months, not years. Why CBT + Gottman Method Is More Effective Than … Read more

Relationship Red Flags and Warning Signs in Modern Relationships

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Person reviewing text messages on a phone with a furrowed brow and uncertain expression, sitting in a quiet living room

The term ‘red flags’ has become so overused that it now covers everything from serious abuse patterns to minor personality quirks. That dilution matters because the flags that actually predict long-term relationship failure are often subtler than the ones people talk about online. This article cuts through the noise and explains which relationship warning signs the research actually links to failure, why the less obvious ones are often more predictive than the dramatic ones, and what distinguishes a fixable problem from a fundamental incompatibility.

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